With this week of Advent being ‘Joy’ week, and after yesterday’s ‘rantier than usual’ post, I thought I’d be more joyful today.
I guess it’s time to explain myself. Some things have happened this year that make me think I should try to articulate why I sometimes use words that may be considered inappropriate for a Christian to use.
As I looked out my bedroom window, I instantly wondered about how my driveway would get shoveled, how to arrange for someone to clean off my van whenever it snows, when and how I’ll put my snow tires on, and why I always seem to need to wait until after it snows before I make arrangements to sort all of that out.
I hate to confess that instead of my dominant emotion being joy, I’m mostly feeling stress.
Stress that I don’t have gifts for those I give things to this time of year.
Stress that I give the perfect gift.
Stress that I don’t forget anything or anyone.
I was informed that some of the women coming into our building were being verbally harassed by some of the workers. They were being whistled at, sexual innuendos were being thrown at them, and they were being mistreated as though they were mere objects; less than human.
Last night we went to our daughter’s Christmas concert. As a musician, and as a bit of a grumpy critical guy in general, I didn’t have high expectations.
So last night I went Christmas caroling.
That’s right. You heard me.
Our whole family bundled up, drove to Parkdale, and went Christmas caroling.
But once we got to Woodbine, we saw a zillion cop cars and ambulances all surrounding the subway station. I then sadly stated that someone must have jumped, the traffic broke up, we drove home, and went about our days.
I went to the gym this morning. It’s been a long time. I’ve not had the motivation to go. The truth is, I’ve been kind of depressed. I’ve been in a ‘why bother?’, ‘what’s the point?’ state of mind. I’ve felt that no matter how hard I try, this disease is kicking my ass. It’s winning.
Imagine a world where there was no more family breakdown.