Late Spring Thoughts

Well it’s pretty clear I can’t seem to find a regular blogging rhythm. The last time I was here it was the middle of winter. Now it’s late spring, the snow is all gone (knock on wood), the flowers are blooming, and summer is imminent. (Though I’m still wearing a sweater lest I freeze. But I refuse to wear pants in June no matter what. It’s just a rule of mine. This is a ‘shorts only’ zone until at least September)

Anyhoo, on this night I, as per usual, am full of random and arbitrary thoughts. So instead of honing in on one of them I thought I’d just throw a bunch of them out there.

1. Politics. This city is ripe with political insanity right now. Our mayor is making international news. He is a lightning rod of divisiveness. There’s no way to remain ambivalent as to how to feel about him. And on a national and provincial scale, stories of corruption and backroom deals abound. As a Christian, I’m convinced that I shouldn’t get sucked into believing there are only 2 sides to these political squabbles. Rather than believing the lie that there’s only the ‘right’ or the ‘left’, I need to stick to my belief that there’s a 3rd way- the Jesus Way. His politics never change. There is no pendulum that shifts. His way doesn’t refer to people as merely ‘taxpayers’ but as ‘citizens’-implying that we are all in this thing together as equals; created in the image of the Creator and Preserver of all things. Created as His beloved children regardless of how much tax we pay. This view changes everything about our politics.

2. Social enterprise. I had the privilege of visiting a brand new program today on its opening day. It’s called ‘Switchback’ and is a bike shop in the downtown core that hires folks who are on or close to the streets. It’s just down the street from our social enterprise at Gateway which we call Gateway Linens. These ideas fall in line with this 3rd way I’m referring to above. The Jesus way seems to be one where we create and provide opportunities for ALL people to find meaningful work for meaningful pay and not get lost in corporate greed where ‘the bottom line’ is the god that gets worshiped.

3. Health. My health is fading. Fast. I am really struggling to walk. I use a cane for everything now. I have a walker. I use a mobility scooter for anything over a city block in distance. MS is kicking my ass. I’m gaining weight and turning into a blob because I can’t exercise like I used to and can’t seem to stop eating. It’s getting brutal. I’ve just been outfitted for leg braces to help me walk. I have to undergo a driving test in the next few weeks to prove that I am still fit to drive. I got assessed for wheeltrans (transit that will pick me up from my home instead of having to use the subway which I can no longer do) and will find out in 10 days if I qualify (I was told by the assessor that I’d be a no brainer decision). I’m going for a comprehensive physio-nutrition-psychological assessment at Toronto rehab on Tuesday morning for help with all of those areas in hopes of bettering my options for exercise and weight control.

I am disabled.

I never dreamed this would be me. It is difficult; not just on me but on my family.

But I’m still trying. I have an awesome job that I can still do even if/when I end up in a wheelchair. I have a wonderful family. I have a cool bike that I can pedal with my arms. I have an electric bike that I love to ride to and from work. I have amazing friends who see pass my sickness. I have a church that I love.

And I have the Jesus way. This way doesn’t make everything easier. It just helps to make things in this very screwed up, messy, complicated world make a little more sense.

So I guess my thoughts aren’t all that random after all…

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