I can see why some folks with disabilities become hermit-like. They build/renovate their homes around themselves in order to fit their needs, and when they go outside realize that their needs can’t be met. So they stay home where it’s safe and comfortable.
Life in General
Thanks for letting me vent last time. Sometimes letting off a little steam is good for the soul…
And thanks also for the words of caution around grace.
I get it.
I’m fairly certain that when Jesus thinks of me He regularly prays ‘Father forgive him for he knows not what he’s doing’.
So I’m running into some relatively painful moments on my mobility scooter these days.
Yesterday was the proverbial last straw.
In 2010 I traveled to Costa Rica with Erinn and Cate for surgery. It was rumored that this procedure could do a lot to alleviate some of the significant symptoms of Multiple Sclerosis that I was experiencing.
I’m now in my 4th year of not going to church in the summer. It’s too hot and humid. My tolerance for humidity gets worse each year due to MS related complications. Humidity simply sucks the life outta me. It’s hard enough as it is. So back when I told my doctor about how I feel when I go to my wonderful, yet old and non-air conditioned church, she told me I’d be wise to not go in the summer.
So I’ve been working out lately. I’ve been going to the gym. I’ve even been swimming again.
And to take it up a notch from things I’ve done previously, I’ve hired a personal trainer. I go to this high intensity gym where all these people are crazy strong and do unbelievable things, and then there’s me and my scooter.
There is an outdoor kind of lounge/garden area that I grew to love when I would come and visit her. It seems that almost no one knows about this place. It’s beautiful and barely anyone ever visits it. I view it now as my own personal Secret Garden. This is the first time I’ve come here on my own since she has passed. I feel close to her in this place.
Life truly does have a funny way about it. There is so much joy, love, beauty, and wonder.
And there is also so much pain, suffering, confusion, fear and doubt.
There are many days where I wish the downside of life just didn’t have to happen.
But I know that it does.
This Carmelite monk dude that lives in the monastery told me about a secret pathway down over the hill to the edge of the river. All I had to do was go down the road a little and look for the sign that says ‘do not enter’ and then, well, enter.
That of course is my kind of path!
The thing about this drug is that it is the first ever medication that addresses issues related to progressive MS; the kind that I have. Apparently it can significantly slow down the progress of the disease. That’s a very big deal if it’s true.